No Title In Mind

On mornings that you wake up feeling like you got hit by a bus and run over by a herd of reindeer at some point during the night, it is my personal opinion that you should, in fact, get hit by a bus and run over by a herd of reindeer at some point during the day so that feeling like you got hit by a bus and run over by a herd of reindeer is thoroughly and satisfactorily justified so you can achieve random people's validation for having lived through being hit by a bus and run over by a herd of reindeer.

I had a dream that I was making out with Billy Crystal. Or rather, Harry Burns (from When Harry Met Sally). I don't even like Billy Crystal. While I was making out with Billy Crystal I was thinking about how much I am not attracted to Billy Crystal. Then he started talking about Boyfriend like he was dead or something. I began to imagine how funny it would be if Boyfriend showed up and started beating Billy Crystal up. He never did though. Then the dream morphed and Billy Crystal disappeared and suddenly I was at school in my underwear. I've never had a dream where I was in my underwear. Not in public anyways. But the funny part is that I wasn't embarrassed. I was completely comfortable without clothes on. My mother on the other hand, was most upset and took me to Wal-Mart and made me wear candy cane striped sweatpants but bought me no top to go with it. How very strange. Either I have a secret desire to come to school in my underwear or I have a deep, undying fear of candy cane striped sweatpants. I don't know which it is.

So there's this very very very annoying person here that usually tries to talk to me. I'm rather miserable today but I actually hope he comes up to me and says something along the lines of 'you look like shit.' because if he does that then I can say something along the lines of '-says something extremely insulting, ego-destructive, character degrading, and so mind-numbingly cruel so that Annoying Person never talks to me again-' It sounds like fun.

So when I make a decent amount of money, I'm completely reinventing my look. I'm buying things from Anthropologie, Banana Republic, Guess, Buckle, Miss Me, and Victoria's Secret. I will dress with straight class. I will be mainly prep with just a hint of retro indie. I can't wait.

I don't understand what it is with all these grown adults being so obsessed with Pokemon. It's a little obscene. A few pull off their addiction quite adorably but for the most part, it irritates me. Get a real hobby people... And a shower and a job while you're at it.

Ok maybe the above statement was a little cruel.

I'm not retracting it.